Some things are just so hard to put into words. Some things really shake you and force you to take a step back and look at the whole world differently. And some things just make you so so grateful for our Heavenly Father's plan of forever families.
This weekend my close cousin, David, was in a terrible car accident in Salt Lake. Grieving is a very personal thing, but also something shared with family and closest friends. I share this story here because some of my closest friends knew him growing up. Because that's the kind of guy he was... your friends were his friends and his friends were yours. Everybody loved David.
Early morning Friday, as he was on his way to work, he stopped for a deer in the intersection. Apparently the light was green and a large truck behind him, not seeing David's car was stopped, slammed into him going 55 miles an hour- going up on top of his small car causing him massive head injuries. There had been no brain activity since immediately after the accident, and he was on life support until they let him go Saturday. His loving family surrounded him and each said their goodbyes. I can't imagine the pain and suffering and also the amount of love in that room. All I know is my heart has never ached like this before. I've found it hard to focus on anything else. And I know I can only feel a fraction of what his sweet wife, Cristina, his two very young children, his loving parents, and siblings feel at this time.
We've been asked to record some of our thoughts and memories of David for his book and I know we'll be reminiscing when I see family this week. These are some of things I've been thinking about this weekend.
When we were young...
I didn't realize when I was young, quite how lucky I was. We got to see and play with our cousins all the time and growing up they became some of my life long BEST friends. Not everybody can say that.
David was the best at including EVERYBODY. It didn't matter if you were a girl, or however many years younger, he would still ask if you wanted to join in on the Role Playing game, or video game tournaments, or ball game in the backyard. We could all squeeze into the basement for the sleepover.
And when he wrote his famous Cousin Plays everyone who wanted to participate was written a specific part.
He always had something funny for the talent shows... like the Elmer Fudd rap for example. "I'm wappin, I'm wappin. No wabbit's gonna catch me nappin!"
Our teenage years...
David became my Summer Brother.
Year after year we'd spend our summers down at Grandpa's ranch. David knew what it meant to work hard but also play hard.
I just remember always laughing around him and wishing I could be as clever and funny. His wittiness made everything fun! He was the spontaneous one- inviting everyone to play night games, go on a random hike, or just pull out the board games. In the early days we'd sneak up into the kitchen and make cookies from the huge sysco frozen dough and fill our water bottles with juice mixes (camden called them "Buffalo Drinks") and stay up in the stables talking and laughing for hours.
He'd often pull out his guitar and invite all around him to join in whether singing, or attempting to play an instrument- even if we sounded awful. :)
All the girls' camps at the ranch would just fall in love with him and his magnetic personality even though in his humility he'd never admit it. He was the one that taught us to "shmooze" the guests at the ranch. Haha. Truly, he taught so many of us cousins what it meant to be outgoing- he inspired all of us to be ourselves.
David was an imaginative builder. He helped grandpa invent and fix all sorts of contraptions at the ranch. One of my favorite memories with him was the night a few of us built ice-block carts. We just had a pile of wood, nails, a hammer, and big ice blocks. We rode those things until they broke. (which with my crafty skills, wasn't too long after I had built mine.)
He was King of the Barn Dances. Everytime we do the "Household Chores" dance in the future with family, we'll be doing it in his honor.
And his cousin movies are now legendary. #1 Northfork Road and the hilarious music videos will be replayed again and again.
As adults...
He continued to invite all the cousins to get together. And one day he introduced us to the love of his life.
David, You and Cristina showed us what sacrifices people make for true love. You brought two worlds together to create a beautiful life and family. Cristina, we are so lucky to have you as our cousin. Your courage and strength is an inspiration to all of us. I pray for the comfort for you and your sweet little ones with all my heart.
***
David, I cry as I sit here, because you truly changed and guided my life for the better. I wish I would have told you these things in person. Those teenage years can be tough but you helped shape me into the person I am today. I know so many of our cousins feel the same.
We thank you for being the Leader of the Pack.
One of the most special memories of us would be the night we had to stay at the Stables at the Ranch by ourselves and we were terrified! Remember that? (It was before the stables were even finished, with the board floors, and we were sleeping on the hammocks and foam mats.) We scared ourselves silly!!.... "What if that scary cardboard sun we saw in the barn suddenly popped up in the window?" Funny things like that. But our conversations turned from scary to spiritual as we talked about Heavenly Father's plan. We talked for hours about how lucky we are to have grown up in this family. I specifically remember you saying you hoped that over the years we'd all stay as close to each other as we were at that time. Even though our families would get larger and we'd all have our own kids, you hoped we'd continue having reunions so our kids could be as close of cousins as we were growing up. You said you thought our family really had something special and unique that not many families have. You also bore your testimony of the gospel to me that night and I'll never forget it. You've been called a spiritual giant, and that's exactly how I'd describe you.
Even though our cousins are spread out more now than ever, coast to coast, you're reuniting us again this week. You never wanted anyone left out while growing up, and I wouldn't want to be left out while we gather to celebrate your amazing life.
I can't comprehend not having you around when we all get together, but I can only imagine what kind of amazing work the Lord has in store for you on the other side. I pray that your incredible wife, children, and family will feel you with them always.
We love you and hope to live with a renewed perspective of what matters most in this life.
